Let It Go

Welcome, my dear solfeggists!


I think I've blogged about this general topic before, but I tend to have troubles with hanging onto stuff that doesn't help me.  Sometimes it's tangible stuff (why are there paystubs from a job I had in 2006 living in the trunk of my car?  Because.), maybe more often it's emotional stuff.  Sometimes I blame it on having a weirdly accurate memory about some things, but the truth is that my mind enjoys (???) reliving situations that it can't reconcile to its own satisfaction.  It grabs on like gangbustas, refuses all distractions, and really concentrates on being upset.  Yeah, I know...healthy, right?  I bet I'm not alone...


This afternoon, I had a conversation with a professor who affirmed something related I've begun to suspect about listening to post-tonal music in general.  In order to enjoy it, I personally have to consciously choose to let go, be less judgy, and let myself not know exactly what's going on or what's coming next.  I have to give up, and in order to do so, I have to on-purpose go find the white flag and run it up the pole.  This is tricky -- unraveling a well-established, intentionally-honed skill set and replacing it with calm awareness is definitely not a simple task.  I'm starting to see that hyper-analysis musically is very much related to my habit of hyper-analysis of situations, people, etc., and that both have a way of getting in the way of me enjoying my life.  


The long-run antidote?  I'm not sure.  I bet it has to do with both effort towards changing a mental pattern and relaxation towards (if one can relax directionally...maybe that contradicts the whole idea of relaxation) the fact that I have the pattern.  After all, I know a lot of neurotic people -- there must be some kind of genetic advantage to being that way, or there wouldn't be so many of us swimming around in the gene pool, right?  


In the short term, however, try this exercise for the week:


All Levels:


Select a piece or two from the list below (or a piece by another composer whose work you find a little difficult or intimidating):


Paul Hindemith - When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloom'd
Bela Bartók - Cantata Profana
Arnold Schoenberg - Gurre-Lieder
Gyorgy Ligeti - Lux Aeterna
Karlheinz Stockhausen - Stimmung 


(roughly in order of accessibility)


Track down a recording (you can buy them on iTunes for cheap, or your local university library or a good public library will have them) and set aside some time to listen.  Sit someplace comfortable, turn off your ringer, close your laptop.  Listen.  Exercise your non-judgy muscles.  Pay more attention to what happens to the sounds than you do to what the sounds themselves are (a tip stolen fair and square from my aforementioned professor).  If your ear needs a break, take one.  Try listening to the whole thing more than one time if you can.  Observe how your experience changes.  


It all sounds a little abstract, I know, but I think we can handle it.  Enjoy!